Don't you hate it when...

Today has been quite a trying day for me. It was the third day of our rafting trip and let's just say things did not go as planned, people yelling or getting angry at other people, crying, adultless rafts floating down stream away from us.

Now rightly so, I would be upset that my kid was out there and there was nobody with them. I do care for these kids as if they were my own. I just maybe had a problem with the way this was handled, let's just say that. While we were on the sidelines fretting about what to do, and getting angry at the guides, we could have been in a boat and on our way up there to catch up with them. What good is it doing us when there are obviously less of us and more of them, so it would be easier for us to go to them. Granted I am not a parent, maybe I should be concerned with the way that I reacted (inside). While I am not saying that they aren't right to be upset, I think that it was a little over the top. I wasn't worried. Is that bad?! Anywho, the guides were awful and they were not very helpful or safety concious. I would assume, wouldn't you that before you let 40-50 3rd-12th graders out on the boat, you would at least teach them how react if they fall out of the boat, even how to paddle or hold a paddle properly. (while they were at it they could teach them how to listen...) There wasn't a guide in every boat, which meant there had to be an adult in every boat, and lucky me, I am an adult. I was glad to help out, but didn't feel as though I was qualified to be leading this boat down a river I had never been down before.

Anyways, I am getting a little burnt out, while I love my job, I also am overly influenced by how people react to me. if they react in any way that is negative, I feel as though it is my fault, I could have done something better. I guess I am a perfectionist that way.

I also have to say that I will have no problem not driving a bus anymore. I just don't like it. It's not that I can't drive, it's that I don't want to drive it or do i feel comfortable in it. Nobody asked me if I wanted to, they just said I would have to. I know that is not the issue, and I am learning to be a servant, it's a long process. I am becoming a little better though, i know it's bad for me to complain, but I just must vent. Anywho...

Sunburned and Worn Out,
J